The backpack feels like a boulder pressing down more hard and forceful against her back with every passing second.  She gasps desperately as she crumples to the ground, too weak to stand and too weak to utter another wretched cry.  She roles over and searches to sky for stars, celestial orbs that she had heard of yet never seen.  She cringes.  If I could only see a star ... then I could hope ... then I would know that progress is possible.  Her instruction book had told her that seeing stars means your personal vision has improved; a layer of your personal darkness, layers which encompass every person to varying degrees, has been lifted from your sight.  This vision improvement means that you are coming closer in relationship with the person the book calls the Maker of the Stars and in understanding of your personal everlasting purpose.  Perfect fellowship with this Maker of the Stars was said to be the goal of all; a vision state of pure light is when this goal is said to be reached.

With a final, desperate inward plea for help, Raef falls into a fitful sleep.



Raef sits up so that her backpack's bottom is resting on the ground.  She tires again, fruitlessly, to remove the objects.  Frustrated at her failure, she twists around and manages to unzip the backpack's top.  Although this awkward motion stretches her side painfully and makes her muscles below her shoulder blade crunch up, this is the only way to see into her backpack.  It is cramped full of objects from top to bottom, containing many items that she hasn't even seen.

Yet on the top of the pack rests 4 very familiar objects that she sees every time it's opened.  The first is wispy white and small; it is her clouding doubt that blocks her mental clearity.  Then next object is a fiery red lump burning to the touch; it is her raging anger.  The third object is a large, heavy black rock that absorbs all light and reflects none; this is her discouragement that constantly sucks at her joy.  The final visible object is shiny and metal with sharp, jagged edges; this is her worry that frequently pierces her side.

She sighs and pounds her fist as a tear of hoplesness slides down her cheek.  She fumbles to regain her composure.  I have to do something! I cannot keep living like this.  She searches her mind for any glimmer of hope.  Her mind runs over all the things she had tried in attempt to rid her backpack's contents, hoping to in turn find abundant life.  How many times have I failed?  I need truth.  She searches her mind again for something that claims it leads to a true way of life, a life of answers, full and free of her hindering objects.  She latches on to what her instruction book had told her.  The Maker of the Stars promises to guide and lead to abundant life if only I will trust and surrender ... I must learn ... learn what it means to surrender this horrid pack ... learn who the Maker of the Stars is ... learn my everlasting purpose ...





She looks around, hoping vehemently for some rapid change, and waits, but nothing seems to happen.  Familiar discouragement barges into her mind.  She is alarmed at its presence so quickly after her prayer.  I don't think I have the strength to fight it.  Her mental exhaustion and attempts to maintain her fading fast hope are draining her out.  I need to do something.  It is time for a walk.

Walking on, she battles with discouragement.  Unlike usual, she does not let it penetrate any deeper into her mind than it has already gone.  This time, she fights not only to defend, but to gain back for truth ground that she has surrendered to it.  The draw on her strength as she does this starts to become unbareable.  Maker of the Stars, I need Your strength to revive me.  She takes a deep breath as she decides to add the next part.  I trust that You are faithful as Your book says and that You will help me as I am doing what Your book commands.  Her battle letting up some, she looks up, realizing that she temporarily had forgotten about her surrounding and her pervious worries.  Where am I?  She scans the around her and starts with surprise.


She hears a voice distinctly and looks up.  She sees a shape.  I am seeing a shape!  Aghast, she keeps walking, staring bewildered at her surroundings.  Little by little, she witnesses darkness being lifted and things becoming clear.  She can see trees, waterfalls, grass, and hints of color.  And although her world is still blanketed in a mist, she can actually see people's forms.  She can, in addition, hear what they are saying much more clearly than previously.

"Well done, my good and faithful servant.  Even though you were incapable of removing your burdens, have trusted me with what's in you.  You have, to the best of your abilities, surrendered to me your life and waited on me to do the rest.  Now come, and see life more abundantly and find what it means to live."  Here the voice trails off and is heard no more, leaving Raef standing alone by a stream.

Raef was so awed by the glory of the voice that it takes a couple of seconds to regain her conscious awareness.  Then she laughs out of jubilation and starts to run.  I heard Him; He is real and true.  He has lifted my darkness! He will show me what it means to live.  Then she stops as a realization strikes her and lets out a cry of delight.  I just ran!  Raef had not run for years because the burden on her back had become too large and weighty.  My burdening objects, they've been eliminated.  The thought shocked her.  Could this possibly be true?  Hurriedly, she sits down and twists around to see inside her backpack.

Instead of her hindering burdens, she sees instead 4 beautiful objects: the first object, a crisp, bright, and hardened drop of water, rests at the very top; this is her clarity of mind spreading wisdom wherever it goes.  Next, her patience, a cool, green leaf soothing to the touch, sits leaving gentleness in its wake.  Besides that, a yellow orb giving glimmering light, her hope ever kindling inside of her, resides.  Finally, a smooth, round white stone, her trusting peace, lies stabilizing her existence.

Joy bubbles through her veins.

He does care; He indeed does love.  He will do what He claims and really will be my strength.  She looks around at her newly brightened world.  I can not believe how gracious His gifts are; I did nothing to deserve them.  In fact, He is the one who got rid of my old burdens in the first place.  And now I have such wonderful treasures in place of them!  She smiles at the thought of what her backpack is now filled with.  But I still have a question unanswered: what now is my everlasting purpose?  She gets up and lightly walks over to a rock.  Puzzled at not receiving another message from the Maker of the Stars already, she looks looking around.  Soon, she spots this message:  He who is guiding will never fail; His love endures forever.  He is just and faithful; He will knock at a heart's door until it's opened or until He is forever rejected.  His servants listen to His voice and obey, showing His love and the Way to all.



Quietly, she walks over to a nearby cottage and finds what she expected the Maker of the Stars to have provided.  She grabs a fresh copy of the instruction book and a blanket and starts walking towards the man.