too much. too small. to Jesus.

it's all too much.  it's all too much at once.

maybe it's not that the world is too big.
maybe it's just that i am too small.

changing the world.
reaching the lost.

we are lost
what is lost
what is found
who is who
what is right
right is what
now is why
why is now

they talk
they walk
they do
they die
they scream
they seem
they seem like
so much
wallowing around in a world
of so much that it's so little

they do
they die
they don't
they talk
they think
who can know
know is what
what is known.


2000 years old
a time so long ago that it seems as cold as stone
in a world where we're surrounded but we really walk alone

but we all are glued to the phone
to afraid to realize the lives we're living are phony
in one place before we do and die
we do or we die; we always die but do we actually do

it's a world where change seems impossible
and meaningless is probable
where everyone thinks something but sometimes no one knows anything.

where anything can appear at the flip of a hat
and maybe its still not that the world is so big
but that i am so small.


the Maker of the Stars
when the sky seems too big and the lights seem to small

the Giver of Life
when life seem too short, too fast, too empty of what feels like it will last

the Hope of the World
when the hope seems to be disintegrating with each shot of a gun, each swing of a sword, each death of a child


we need you. 

"To deny oneself is to be aware only of Christ and no more of self, to see only him who goes before and no more of the road which is too hard for us.  Once more, all that self-denial can say is “He leads the way, keep close to him.”
Dietrich Bonhoeffer 
© 2015 Deborah Hope Shining


I definitely don't want this to be a monologue. What are your thoughts? Questions? Ideas?